The hurly bird catches the worm

Write-up by Gerry McDonnell

Get in touch with me old-fashioned, but i believe that fidelity stays the cornerstone of a profitable connection. I would in no way cheat on my wife, unless the possibility arose.

I have severe doubts more than my wife’s respect for monogamy. The phrase on the road is that Ashley Cole was physically sick whilst doing the horizontal 64-second jig, which fits in flawlessly with the wife’s M.O.

I can’t condemn Cole too strongly, as he’s not the 1st guy to hurl right after munching on a late-evening kebab. On reflection, he probably need to have caught with a sausage sandwich. A Chelsea draw against Pompey ticks all the appropriate boxes at 5/two, and then cleans them with disinfectant.

It’s been reported that Ashley refused to wrap up his small warmth-seeking missile just before sending him into battle. Apart from the obvious risk of items falling off, there is also the danger of an undesired pregnancy. If I didn’t often suffocate my mini whale-hunter, I could have had three kids by now. Fulham are also lackadaisical in defence, they’re on a 14 match winless streak. Aston Villa will consider total benefit at 7/five.

Adebayor is a top quality player, but you cannot clear up a dilemma by planting your nut on it we haven’t all moved to Scotland. I can’t get my head all around the ten/11 for an Arsenal win above Manchester City.

Liverpool will need a new slogan to commemorate their position as the European Capital of Culture. I’ve recommended, ‘Liverpool – Generating fat children cry since 2008’. I’ll be inconsolable if the Reds beat Sunderland, I’ve been tempted by the 4/one for a draw.

With Liverpool stuttering like Jeremy Beadle’s manicurist, a 4th area finish is unexpectedly up for grabs. I anticipate Blackburn v Everton to be tighter than Mido’s belt as the war for four intensifies. I’m sitting on the fence at 9/4.

Dave Kitson is in line for a shock get in touch with up to the England side. The Studying hitman will be overjoyed if he earns his 1st cap, as sunlight is a long-phrase foe. I’ve observed the light I’ve backed Reading through at six/5 at home to Bolton.

Cheryl Cole has followed Danielle Lloyd’s lead in refusing to dump her allegedly unfaithful partner. What is it that can make these sturdy ladies stand by their men? I’ll get my fingers on tons of cash when Manchester United beat Tottenham at even funds.

Now that Barack Obama has revealed himself to be a Hammer, Dave Whelan need to be regretting his campaign to relegate West Ham towards the finish of very last time. Whelan may be ready to fix the value of an England shirt, but he’s going to shed a strength battle with possibly the following leader of Iran. The Hammers have a a hundred% record at the JJB in the Premier League Barack and I will be on at nine/5.

If Derby have been to avoid relegation, it would be the greatest shock because i arrived home from operate early to discover the spouse in a degrading place she was lying on the floor watching Beadle’s About. I’ll be even a lot more disappointed if Birmingham fail to beat Derby at four/7.

It was a case of déjà vu for Kevin Keegan as Newcastle misplaced 3- to Arsenal in midweek a handful of lads hit him on the head with a baseball bat. It really is absolutely incorrect to kick somebody when they’re down, unless you’re Alan Shearer. Newcastle isn’t massive sufficient for Keegan and Large Al, so God knows how Frank Lampard ever before played there. ten/11 is lots huge ample for a Newcastle win over Middlesbrough.

Like Ashley Cole, Frank Lampard has allegedly had a wandering eye. I can see why Lampard would have suitors, who amongst us doesn’t like a large pair of breasts? Arsenal, Birmingham, Manchester United and Aston Villa sort an accer that stands out at a in particular pert 11/1.

About the Author

Gerry McDonnell dabbles in football odds compilation, journalism and orphan rescue.